Thought Recorders

In the quiet moments I think best. In these solitude moments I can create the most witty dialogue and paint the most picturesque scenery with a most expansive vocabulary. The only problem is that in these quiet moments there isn’t a single pen or piece of paper, or even the time if I had the former, to jot these fantastic lines of prose down.

No, my quiet moments are always first thing in the morning while I shower and dress and get myself ready for work. My body is busy with these mindless tasks leaving my brain to wander and create. It’s wonderful to have this time, to think through plots and scenarios, don’t get me wrong! The frustration is that even the most witty of dialogue exchanges are forgotten by the time I am finally able to commit them to paper.

The solution is simple, you say, record your thoughts on some type of recording device. Ah! Not so simple as you may think. See my brain is free to wander during these mundane tasks, but were I to start voicing these thoughts the moment would no longer be quiet nor would the prose wax as beautiful.

You see, I am what could be described as two hour witty: meaning I am as witty as can be, two hours after it should have come out of my mouth. In the moment, my wit escapes me, but once I’ve mulled the conversation over and over in my mind I find the perfect quip that I should have used. This usually happens about two hours after I’ve walked away from that conversation.

I have the perfect solution, though. Come on! You knew I would. What I need is a, say it with me, thought recorder! Like something out of Star Trek or even a close cousin to the Dream Recorder used on Red Dwarf. A simple device that somehow, preferably painlessly, attaches to the temple and records your thoughts. Naturally it would have to have a waterproof outer casing so I can put it on before my shower. Not to mention a HUGE amount of storage space to record at least an hour’s worth of literary ramblings.

So my engineering friends, there is your task: make a thought recorder so that I stop losing so much valuable material!

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